Why Renewal?

As a Franciscan Sister of the Renewal I am often asked, “Why Renewal?” It’s a fair question! Over the years, I’ve realized there isn’t a single answer. On one hand I can give the history of our community’s founding in the late 80’s and our connection with the Capuchin Franciscan Reform. I could also share about the work we do that strives to renew our culture and our world. Another direction I can go, which is what I want to reflect on here, is our call to personal and on-going conversion. Mother Mary Francis, PCC, poignantly states in her book about the renewal of religious life that, “we shall never affect more good in the inner city than we do in the inner circle of the community or, more fundamentally, in the inner courts of our soul.” As a community, the renewal that we are seeking to bring about in those we serve begins with, and I would say depends upon, our own personal and daily conversion to Christ.

What exactly is conversion? It comes from the Greek word metanoia meaning to turn towards. It is the on-going battle to turn away from sin and to turn towards God. It is the process of letting God reign more fully in our hearts. Conversion is not a “one and done” deal; it is continuous and daily way of life. It’s also not simply up to us; God gives us the strength to begin anew (CCC 1432).

On September 21, we celebrated the Feast of St. Matthew, a man who let Christ’s love radically transform his heart and thus his life. We hear in the Gospel that Jesus called Matthew at the customs post and he “left everything, and rose and followed him” (Luke 5:28). Imagine yourself in that situation. Instantaneously leaving everything behind: all you own, your wealth and prestige, your friends and any sense of comfort or security to follow a man who mysteriously touched your heart.

This is what each of the saints show us, a life totally given to God because they each knew what had been given to them – which was everything. When we know how deeply loved we are, the only response is to love in return. When St. Francis encountered the leper and was able to overcome himself, “what was bitter became sweet.”

St. Paul, upon hearing Jesus ask him, “Why are you persecuting me?” was transformed from a persecutor of Christians to one of the most zealous preachers of Christ’s love and mercy. Each saint, in their own way, was touched by Jesus’ love which led them to turn completely to Him. Truly encountering Jesus’ love is the source of any genuine conversion. We are all forgiven sinners, ransomed by the precious blood of Jesus, which is a free and unmerited gift from the Father.

I can remember the point in college when I realized I needed a deeper conversion to Christ. I was already actively living my faith, going to Mass and confession frequently, and involved in the student chaplaincy, yet there were still parts of my heart and ways I was living that were inconsistent with the faith I professed each Sunday. My lips would say one thing, but my heart and hands would do another. It wasn’t always in big dramatic ways, but little things that said, “Jesus, I don’t really care about you in this moment” or “Jesus, I love this thing more than you.” It was through a conversation with a friend that I received the grace to see that if I was going to love Jesus, it had to be with my whole heart; I couldn’t pick and choose which parts of His teaching I would follow. It was all or nothing. It was a sobering realization which had real consequences. Despite the growing pains of change, I began to see a deeper peace and joy in my heart. Even now as a sister, there are still parts of my heart that need a deeper conversion. Places of selfishness, pride, fear and so on that need to turn more fully to Christ. I can attest through personal experience, that the more deeply I can give my heart to Christ, the more I can become an instrument of grace and affect true change in the world.   

So, to return to the initial question, we are Franciscan Sisters of the Renewal to participate in Jesus’ renewal of all things, beginning with our own daily conversion. The Catechism states that conversion leads to deeper communion which brings about the Kingdom of God here on Earth (CCC 821). It sounds cliché, but the only person we can change is ourselves, therefore, any effective change in the world will begin with our own personal conversion. This call to renewal is not only for us as religious sisters, it is for everyone, it is a part of the universal call to holiness. I invite you to reflect on these questions: what are ways you can more fully give your heart to Our Lord? What areas of your life may need a deeper conversion? God will use you to affect real change in the world – how amazing is that? What’s the grace that you need to take the next best step towards Christ? God will give you the grace, you only need to ask. Don’t be afraid, ask big!

Sr. Colette, CFR